Greg explains that since his and Rowley's fight in the
previous book, their friendship is history. Susan, Greg’s mother, goes back to college to stimulate her mind, and the Heffley men must care for themselves. Food is often ruined, and Greg is short of clean clothes. Greg's father, Frank, makes Greg responsible for waking himself up. Greg puts his
alarm clock under his bed, but the ticking sounds like a bomb, and he cannot sleep. He accidentally activates the school
fire alarm, and the school closes early. Frank is not happy to be called from work to pick up Greg. A maid, Isabella, arrives to help with the kids after school. She spends her time watching
television and eating snacks. Greg finds her sock in his bed, showing she has been napping there. Frank takes Greg to his dentist, Dr. Kagan. After Greg accidentally bites his finger, Dr. Kagan retaliates by prescribing
headgear for his
overbite. Greg loses his headgear the next day and later finds Manny wearing it, and vows never to wear it again. At the school
lock-in, Greg is shocked that 90% of the crowd are boys (including Rowley). Mr. Tanner confiscates their cell phones. At 3:00 AM, some parents arrive to take their kids home because they have not answered their cell phones, leaving Greg and Rowley behind. The next week, Greg becomes sick from lack of sleep, and Susan leaves him with Isabella. He is awoken by noise from downstairs; Isabella has invited all the neighborhood maids to watch
soap operas. Susan arrives home early and fires her, pleasing Greg. Rowley has a pimple on his forehead and tells Greg he's "becoming a man". Susan and Frank talk to Greg about their experiences of being late bloomers. Greg writes a fake note to Rowley signed "The Girls" about no one liking his zit. Jordan Jury, a popular kid in the grade above, invites Greg and Rowley to his party. However, Susan says he cannot go because his uncle Gary's fourth wedding is on that day. Greg worries about reading the
Old Testament because adults think it's cute when a kid cannot pronounce a word. He is nervous about getting "The Talk" from his 95-year-old great-grandmother. He hears Susan talking about picking up "Greg's tuxedo", and is thrilled, thinking he's going to be a
groomsman. At Gammie's, Greg sleeps in a crowded room with all the family's
bachelors. He sneaks out and sleeps in the bathroom, waking just in time before Gammie comes in for a bath. Before the rehearsal dinner, Greg describes how old and valuable her belongings are. He says he ate some old
taffy once and got sick; he later saw a photo of his father eating the same candy when he was Greg's age. To his dismay, he discovers that he will not be a groomsman but an assistant flower boy to Manny. Uncle Gary's best man, Leonard, gives a speech about how Uncle Gary and Sonja got engaged: at a baseball game, Gary was about to break up with Sonja so he could date her sister, but an airplane with a banner reading "Marry me Sonja?" - not meant for Gary's Sonja - coincidentally flew over the stadium and Sonja reacted to it. Sonja is upset, and Greg thinks they will soon divorce. Greg gets "The Talk" from Gammie, who tells him that getting older is not all it is cracked up to be. Upon returning to school, Greg learns that he dodged a bullet – Jordan only invited Greg's grade to his party to use them as servants. Greg and Rowley go back to being friends when Greg chooses to make a difference instead of just waiting for Rowley to come to him. ==Reception==