In the summer after the signing of the Treaty of Greenville, which restored peace between Indians and settlers, Alder decided to return to the white community. He married Barshaw, He built a cabin, took up the lifestyle of a farmer, and raised hogs, cows and horses. He sold milk and butter he made to the Indians, and pork and horses to the whites. Alder began adopting the white community's habits, and learned English from the other white settlers. While living in Pleasant Valley, Barshaw struggled to integrate with settler life. She gave birth to two of Alder's children, but both died in infancy. The couple decided the
Great Spirit was opposed to their marriage, and separated. Alder gave Barshaw most of the couple's property, including the cabin, all of the cows, seven horses, and about
$200 in silver. Alder kept only two horses and the hogs. After some time, Alder developed interest in his original family in Virginia. A companion, John Moore, learned that Alder had been taken prisoner near
Greenbrier, and traveled to Wythe County to search for Alder's family. Initial inquiries were unsuccessful, but one of a series of advertisements Moore placed in the district was seen by Alder's surviving brother Paul. Paul then wrote Jonathan to inform him that the family was still alive. Alder left for Paul's house, with Moore, in November 1805. He and Moore arrived in Virginia the Sunday after New Year, and Alder was reunited with his biological mother and siblings. Alder stayed with his family in Virginia for over a year, and while visiting his family, he met and fell in love with Mary Ann Blont, a woman from Virginia. The couple were married on January 6, 1806, and in August 1806, Alder, Blont, and the rest of Alder's family returned to Pleasant Valley. Alder built another log cabin along the
Big Darby Creek in 1806, and he and Mary had 12 children between 1808 and 1830. ==Military career==