Like a Velvet Glove Cast in Iron is about a man named Clay Loudermilk and his attempts to locate his estranged wife. (The song "the
Ballad of Barbara Allen" forms a commentary on the story with its elements of unrequited love, loss, and death.) For reasons unknown, Clay is in the audience at a
porno theatre when he sees a bizarre
BDSM feature (also titled
Like a Velvet Glove Cast in Iron), the star of which is revealed to be his wife, who appears in the credits as "Madame Van Damme". Clay sets out to locate her and becomes embroiled in a series of misadventures involving an incredibly weird cast of supporting characters. Clay is victimized by two crazed policemen, meets a religious cult led by a mass-murderer who intend to overthrow the American government, conspiracy theorists who believe that the reins of the world's political power somehow revolve around a series of dime store novelty figures, a malformed, half-fish young woman and her
nymphomaniacal mother, and various other freaks and weirdos. During one dream sequence, the infamous
Foot Foot, from the song by
The Shaggs, gnaws on Clay's leg. The happy-face icon of "Mr. Jones" also appears in various places through the story (reminiscent of
Alfred E. Neuman, the mascot of
Mad magazine, whose image dates at least back into the 1800s). Images of Mr. Jones are tattooed into people, carved on to Clay's foot, as a ghost-like character, in
Hitler's birthmark, and on the sign for Value Ape shops. It signifies the way in which logos pervade our societies, and links to the conspiracy elements of the story. The true nature of the fish-woman's father is never learned by Mr. Loudermilk, but readers familiar with the stories of
H.P. Lovecraft will note connections to Lovecraft's novella
The Shadow over Innsmouth, which involves the monstrous interbreeding of humans and unspeakable denizens of the deep. The phrase "
Kenneth, what is the frequency?", referencing the bizarre
Dan Rather incident (some years before the
R.E.M. song did the same thing), is used as part of the "Mr. Jones" conspiracy sub-plot. There are, in addition, references to
child pornography and
snuff films. == In other media ==