Born at
Presque Isle, Flewelling grew up in northern
Maine, United States. She has worked as a teacher, a house painter, a necropsy technician, and a freelance editor and journalist. She has been married to Douglas Flewelling since 1981, and has two sons. She currently lives in
Redlands, California, where she continues to write, and offers lectures and creative writing workshops at the
University of Redlands. Flewelling is a convert to
Thiền Buddhism, having taken her vows with
Engaged Buddhist monk
Thich Nhat Hanh, and is a practitioner of
Buddhist meditation. Flewelling's writings promote
feminism and
LGBT causes, having said in relation to these topics, "I’ve always believed that people are people, and it’s wrong to discriminate against them just because of what gender or group they fall into." ==Writings==