When one or both members of a couple refuse to communicate, this can mark the final step in the breakdown of their relationship.
John Gottman characterised this stage as the
fourth horseman in his
Cascade Model of Relational Dissolution. In his studies, "stonewalling" was overwhelmingly done by men, with women overwhelmingly using "criticism". In his studies, men's physiology reached a state of arousal before "stonewalling", while the female partner showed a physiological reaction of increased heart rate after her partner had "stonewalled" her. When stonewalling occurs, it has both a physiological and psychological effect on the person who is stonewalling. Physiologically, the person who is stonewalling can completely shut down, particularly when it is used as a self-soothing mechanism. The person doing stonewalling may be aware or unaware that this is taking place, because of an
increase in adrenaline due to an increase in stress, where the person can either engage or flee the situation. Because stonewalling is a physiological reaction, the stonewalling can be thought of as a
fight or flight response. Psychologically, stonewalling is a
defense mechanism for preserving one's self and emotions. Other signs of stonewalling are silence, mumbling monotone utterances, changing the subject and physically removing oneself from the situation (e.g., leaving the room). ==Witnesses==