•
Brian Potter (Kay) – the notoriously selfish social secretary of the working men's club The Neptune. He lost the use of his legs when his former club flooded. It is suggested that he can actually walk, as at the end of the episode he is seen to stand while remonstrating with a group of firefighters. •
Max and Paddy (Kay and
Paddy McGuinness) – two inept
bouncers at The Neptune. •
Jerry St. Clair (
Dave Spikey) – a part-time builder and the compère at The Neptune, and a previous winner of Talent Trek. •
Les Alanos – The Neptune's house band, comprising Les (
Toby Foster) and Alan (
Steve Edge). Les originally worked with Alan's father before he left to form the tribute band "Right Said Frank'". •
Paul le Roy (Kay) – a local
disc jockey for the
radio station Chorley FM. He is obsessed with the music of the 1980s. He sports a
mullet and has a long-suffering wife. •
Keith Lard (Kay) – an overly zealous local fire safety inspector that, it is alleged, interferes with dogs. • '''Patrick O'Neil
(Kay) – a cheeky employee at the Apollo Bingo Hall, who, alongside his friends "Sparky
" (Alex Lowe) and Yvonne''' (
Sian Gibson), causes havoc in the Apollo. •
Tom Dale (Kay) – a
Liverpudlian bingo caller known for his bizarre pre-show preparations and his catchphrase "let's tickle those balls". •
Rose and Theresa (Kay and Beatrice Kelley) – two middle-aged bingo fans that assume anyone that wins is sleeping with Tom Dale. •
Mr Softy Top, aka
Robert Edge (Kay) – a third-generation
ice cream man that hates children. •
Signór Whippee (Kay) – an ice cream man and Mr Softy Top's rival. •
Darren Bramwell (Kristian Tiffany) – a college student that works for Mr Softy Top on weekends. •
Matthew Kelly (Kay) – an aspiring Irish actor that is unhappily stuck in several part-time jobs. •
Johnny Utah, also known as Craig (Kay) – a surly
Wild West obsessive that works as a coach driver. •
Duncan Beach (
Daniel Kitson) – a
St. John Ambulance volunteer that is devoted to his job, but treated with contempt by those he treats. •
Chris Choi (
Neil Fitzmaurice) – one half of the security group Live Sec. •
Shaun Ballen (Kay) – the other half of the security group Live Sec. •
Carol and Edina (Jo Enright and Lynda Thornhill) – two Concertgoers dressed up in fitting attire for the 70s music show. •
Leonard de Tomkinson (Kay) – an elderly, kindly local eccentric. Owing to
angina, he is unable to work, but has a paper round and is, therefore, Britain's oldest
paperboy. •
Marc Park (Kay) – an aspiring pop star and former
greengrocer that looks like
Mick Hucknall. He has a dog called Lady. •
Cheryl Avenue (Claire Rhodes) – an aspiring pop star, and former member of Park Avenue, she is the former long suffering partner of Marc Park and mother to his child. She later gained a pop career in her own right while also making her ex look bad much to his chagrin. •
Pearl Hardman (Kay) – a would-be career woman that manages a Bolton
service station. •
Alan McClarty (Kay) – an emotionally unstable Scottish mechanic that worked for the
RAC before his wife left him and he had a nervous breakdown. He now runs his own breakdown company, "ARC". ==Reception==